


i'll never catch up with you

by ShatterinSeconds



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: I'm Sorry, Langst, M/M, Oneshot, Season 2 spoilers, but I had to write this, klance, lance is my son and i want to protect him, set right after season 2
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-29
Updated: 2017-01-29
Packaged: 2018-09-20 18:21:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,474
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9505106
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShatterinSeconds/pseuds/ShatterinSeconds
Summary: Some days--no, most days--the world moves too fast, and there’s Lance, his arm stretched out and fingers dangling in thin air as everyone moves on without him.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Listen to this while reading:  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wl6f0kt29jw

Some days--no, most days--the world moves too fast, and there’s Lance, his arm stretched out and fingers dangling in thin air as everyone moves on without him. He’s left behind, alone with his thoughts. His tragic thoughts. 

**It starts** with his older sister and her acceptance to a college 3,000 miles away from their childhood home. And suddenly he finds the room she’s lived in for eighteen years empty and her many different shoes cluttering the entrance to their home cleared away and her miscellaneous items always scattered around the house simply gone. He mesmerizes her dark curly hair, drifting just above her lower back in one smooth wave as she walks out through the door, the last box filled with her belongings tucked in her embrace. 

**It starts** when he’s at the Garrison, how Hunk--bless his soul that he never drifted too far away from Lance, though that doesn’t mean he never stepped away even for a moment--excelled in almost every aspect of the school. Ahead in the engineering courses, Hunk (along with Pidge) is soon shuffled to more advanced classes. Leaving Lance to fend for himself with the majority. With the group of people no one considers exceptional. 

**It continues** when Lance begins to notice a certain person, strolling down the halls, head ducked down, expression on his angular features projecting the sentiment of wanting to be anywhere but the Garrison. Lance always spots this boy--his rival, the one person he wants to catch up to before he too leaves Lance alone in the dust--with another man. A man who’s older and wiser and far beyond Lance’s reach. So he doesn’t even bother trying to hang onto the thought of his idol staying.  (Spoiler: he doesn’t)

His idol’s--Shiro’s--brother(?) or friend(?) stays around the longest though, well at least the longest out of a list of people that doesn’t include family members. 

But even the untouchable is taken away from Lance’s outstretched grasp. And he watches Keith disappear from his line of sight, the Garrison doors closing and breaking the connection between their eyes. Keith is the  _ only  _ person who has glanced backwards as he leaves, and Lance is his last view of the Garrison before Keith vanishes.

To somewhere where Lance didn’t think he could follow. Or somewhere he wasn’t meant to.  

When Lance looks in the mirror, at his exhausted, unkempt appearance, there’s a slight quirk of his lips as he practices his smirk and smile and other elements of his mask that keep his true feelings hidden from the others. But Lance can’t even fool his reflection, his eyes dead, void of any emotion. Fake or real. 

He’s in space now, and though he’s part of a team--a team that’s supposed to save the known universe no less--Lance has never felt more left behind.

Not when he’s the seventh wheel, or the eleventh if he wants to count the mice this time around. They’ve been more helpful than he has been. What’s the point of a sharpshooter who can’t even hold a gun anymore, at least not without trembling and not since their leader had vanished, taking the last ounce of Lance’s confidence with him.

Evidence of shock breaks through, spreading across Lance’s features in a tidal wave as he stumbles upon a person he thought left him long ago. It’s late, the castle dark, the halls empty, and the bridge abandoned. Except for one silhouetted figure, beautifully illuminated by the Balmeran crystal, his gaze caught in the stars. His mind most likely there as well.

Keith turns his head, startled by the sound of Lance’s bare feet squeaking against the floor.

“Sorry,” Lance mumbles, “I’ll leave.” 

“No,” Keith quietly whispers--well maybe not quietly, as Lance can hear his words perfectly. “I’d rather not be alone.”

Hesitant, though relieved, Lance finds himself willingly sitting next to Keith. They’re inches apart, hands by their sides, and eyes not looking at each other. Instead they gaze at the stars and the wide endless expanse of space before them. Dark and cold and unforgiving, a shiver runs across Lance’s body, but it’s also beautiful with a million stars and the thought of billions and billions of creatures out there living their lives. Lance’s body has never felt heavier than it does now. He turns his head to the side, subtly studying the curve of Keith’s perfect profile before he speaks. 

“What are you looking for?” Lance asks, his voice low and sad. 

Keith catches Lance’s gaze, his lips captured in a perpetual frown. “Shiro, who else?” He continues explaining before Lance has the ability to comment. “I know it’s stupid. But somehow, I feel like if I keep looking at the stars every night I’ll remember something or see something or maybe, just maybe he’ll walk through those doors like nothing had happen.” His voice catches as he sucks in a breath.

Dreams never harmed anyone, except when they gave one false hope. 

Lance notices, with a deeper frown on his own face, that large bags hang under Keith’s eyes. His skin, pale and taut, ages him in a way it shouldn’t.  “Have you gotten any sle--”

“He told me to lead Voltron, did you know that?” Keith unapologetically interrupts, his hands trembling as he clenches them into fists. 

Without warning, Lance wraps his arms around Keith, dragging his body closer and allowing his head to fall onto Lance’s shoulder. With the last amount of strength Lance possesses he desperately tries to pass it onto Keith. Because his problems cannot be compared to having the unwanted weight of a fractured team thrusted on your shoulders.

No one wants to drag around dead weight like Lance. 

“You’ll be a great leader, Keith.” Lance wonders why Keith hasn’t pulled away yet, but neither has Lance so there must be something comforting about the tight embrace.

“I’m thinking of asking Allura to lead or help. To fly the Black Lion. But--” Keith hiccups and Lance realizes he’s silently crying. “--I don’t want to disappoint Shiro.”

“Keith, Keith,” Lance assures soothingly, his fingers tangling in Keith’s unruly hair and rubbing concentric circles on the exposed skin of his back. “You aren’t disappointing Shiro. In fact he should be proud of you, only a true leader knows when to ask for help and to not take the whole burden on by yourself.”

Keith weakly nods, and rapidly changes the subject, faster than Lance’s mind can calculate. “I know, Lance, I know you’ve been struggling too. And I’m sorry I haven’t--that I haven’t tried to help you.”

“You don’t have to help me.” His face is buried into Keith’s shirt and neck, locks of hair tickling his nose. “I’m not worth the effort.”

Jerking away from Lance, Keith narrowly misses banging his head into Lance. His gray eyes narrow in anger, and he gently cradles Lance’s jaw in both of his hands, his thumbs running across his cheekbones. “You. Are. Not. Worthless. You’re not. You’re the bravest person I know; you’re the  _ best  _ person I know.”

“No,” Lance shakes his head in protest, but Keith’s grip tightens.

“You are, and you have to trust me. I have never lied to you Lance McClain and I never will. You’re brave and fearless and smart and beautiful. It’s all true and I don’t want to hear you say anything contradicting that. There’s just one thing…”

Warmth, that Lance hasn’t felt since he was a child back in Cuba when his whole family was together and whole, when he didn’t understand the feeling of being left behind, blossoms in his chest. Sparking a flame in the darkest of places and chasing away the shadows in his mind. 

“What?” he responds cautiously, his sapphire eyes raw with trust and hope. 

“Lance, I don’t want you to leave me either. I  _ need  _ you.”

He rests his forehead on Keith’s, his lips mouthing the words over and over again. Their noses are brushing and he thinks he sees the hint of a smile on Keith’s face. “Only if  _ you  _ don’t leave me too.”

His pale lips pucker in response. “Promise?”

"Promise _. _ ”

Their pinkies lock in a binding contract, eyes bright and lips stretched wide in a shared smile. 

Lance looks at Keith’s eyes instead of the stars, because right now the different hues of purple and blue and gray are all Lance cares to see. 

One day Lance knows Keith will break that promise, willingly or unwillingly--by some act of bravery that will cost Keith his life or just because he found someone less pathetic than Lance. But that doesn’t matter to him right now. Right now Lance has finally caught up to someone who left him behind. And he’ll hold onto Keith as long as he can. 

Forever if possible. 

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave comments and kudos:)


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